Kalshi Gave Away Groceries. Polymarket Became One.
One brought a cat meme. One signed a lease. The grocery wars are here.
Kalshi gave away $50 in groceries. Polymarket opened a grocery store. This escalated.
Monday morning, Kalshi dropped its move: “F it. Free groceries for everyone.” $50 tabs at West Side Market. No app download. No strings. Just vibes and a viral ad that looked like it was made in 45 minutes because it probably was.
The line snaked down 12th Street. People stood in the February cold for eggs paid for by prediction market fees. Kalshi won the morning.
Then Polymarket responded. And this is where it gets absurd.
“After months of planning…” they announced The Polymarket. Not a pop-up. Not coupons. An actual free grocery store. In New York City. They signed a lease. They donated $1M to the Food Bank. Grand opening February 12.
Kalshi gave away groceries. Polymarket became a grocery store.
$430M on Polymarket, $100M+ on Kalshi. Half a billion on one city’s mayor. You degens funded this. Now your fees are buying groceries.
Somewhere in that $430M is fuxfux007. He bet $958K against Zohran. It’s worth zero now.
One brought a cat meme. One signed a lease. fuxfux007’s blown mayor bet is now somebody’s free eggs.